Hello everyone!
Okay, so I will admit - I may be just a tiny bit embarrassed by the title of this blog, and the book, but I will also say right off the bat that it's not as bad as it sounds. I mean, I've obviously heard of worse (Fifty Shades, anyone?) and never read them, but I ran into this particular book on Goodreads when a friend of mine added it to her want-to-read list, so I went and snooped around a little.
It can't hurt, right?
Well, after finishing off The Fiery Cross (which, for those of you who don't know, is the fifth book in Diana Gabaldon's Outlander series, and as with each of her books, a chunk to chew on), I needed something that wouldn't make me want to do history math of who threw who overboard and where bags of tea ended up at the bottom of a bay, not to mention, I didn't need to worry about a rapist coming back to haunt me in subsequent books.
So.
To sum up, I needed a book where I wouldn't have to think along with it, which excluded mystery and thrillers, and I needed something that wasn't historical, and also, fantasy was a no go (I'm stuck at around 55% of The Elfstones of Shannara at the moment, poking myself to continue).
That was how I ended up with Alice Clayton's Wallbanger.
I will admit this: I was a little bit afraid of what I as getting myself into.
Because, admittedly, I don't read this kind of stuff. I've avoided Fifty Shades like it's the new era version of Bubonic Plague come to haunt us, and I'm fairly sure other authors of the same genre would get the basic no treatment from me.
But for some reason, this one drew me in and I wanted to read it. And I can tell you, I haven't regretted it for one second. Also, to disappoint: yes, there is wallbanging going on. Not so much as one would think judging by the title, though.
So, Caroline, an interior designer, moves into a spiffy new flat in San Francisco with her cat, Clive, and she's thoroughly happy because, at 26, life is looking up for her. With one glaring exception: she has been abandoned by what (or who) she refers to as 'O' - I'll leave you all to figure out just what that means, precisely, but I will give you a hint: she hasn't seen O since a failed one night stand that did not do her any favours. I'm only saying that the guy had no idea what he was doing, mind you (a universal apology to all guys out there, at this point).
Now she's in this apartment, and she wants to sleep - and a picture falls on her head because her neighbour, whose bedroom is on the other side of her bedroom wall, is, ahem, wallbanging.
We meet three ladies he seems to have a harem with, nicknamed Spanx, Purina, and the Giggler. I won't go into further details, aside from the fact that Purina makes Clive go kitty crazy.
One night, Caroline has enough, and she barges over to the door in a pink nightie (don't ask why she's even wearing one in the first place) and that's how she meets her neighbour, Simo Parker, for the first time.
From there, we are taken through a hilarious situation where Caroline's BFFs Sophia and Mimi meet Simon's BFs Ryan and Neil, and start dating, but each with the wrong guy for them. Simon and Caroline, meanwhile call it a truce, starting off on wobbly legs after Clive goes after Purina one way, but it does hold ... sort of.
The friendship grows as Simon discovers Caroline's talent for cooking and especially baking, and they start doing casual things together, like watching movies, walking, talking, etc. By this point in the book, you can see that they do like each other, but it won't be that easy. A weekend in Tahoe marks the point when Caroline basically throws herself at Simon, gets rejected, and the other two couples mix and match to their heart's content and happy ending.
Our heroes, however, aren't aving the easiest of times, although after a disastrous encounter with an ex, Caroline lets Simon in as a friend again, and slowly, surely, things definitely start changing.
For one, he dissolves his harem.
And he takes her along to Spain with him.
Did I mention he's a world-famous photographer?
Spain is the breaking point for them as they finally admit a relationship might be in the cards, though Caroline, still on the hunt for the missing O, flees a day early after faking it and returns home to bake furiously, only to find Simon flew home early, too ...
Let's just say the kitchen becomes a restricted area.
O returns, happiness reigns, and Jillian, along with her fiancé Benjamin (who, conveniently, knows Simon) congratulate themselves on a matchmaking well done.
This book had equal parts of silliness, downright craziness and hilarity, and not just because Caroline keeps talking to Clive like he's a separate, thinking entitiy (then again, he gets the last word in the epilogue, so who am I to talk?), but also because Caroline was just adorkable, even when she was being utterly ridiculous. The characters were just so ... real! And despite the rather misleading title, so to speak, it was actually a really cute sort of romantic book in a way. I will admit that I've already read the second, Rusty Nailed, but that review will have to wait for another blog post.
For now, I leave you with this little ditty, because I'm nice like that.
And then the screaming began. And it was not my own.
Out of the corner of my eye, I became aware of some kind of furry missile racing across the floor.
Like some kind of feline dive bomb, Clive ran at Simon, leaped, and dug into his back, attacking him from behind.
Simon ran from the bedroom into the hallway, then back in again, Clive still latched on like some kind of rabid coonskin back cap that would not shake off. He had his arms—does a cat have arms?—wrapped around Simon’s neck in a way that under other circumstances would have seemed like an adorable cat hug. But right now, he meant business.
I ran after them, naked except for my apron, trying to get Simon to slow down, but with those ten claws digging deeper in, he continued running from room to room.
Alice Clayton, Wallbanger, p.248
xx
*image not mine
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