"Do you fear death?"
Hello everyone!
Oh yeah, that's basically all it's about in this one, really.
Well, that and a vast expansion of the world that suddenly becomes much, much bigger and grander than what we previously imagined.
Pirates of the Caribbean sail on the high seas once more, but this time they need to be wary of multiple things at once.
Betrayal abounds, and people seem to fall in lust left, right and center, and by GOODNESS but the sanest people you'd think should know what they're doing are actually the biggest idiots at the same time.
So without further ado, let's make sure we don't end up in bone cages.
Dead Man's Chest is a-thumpin', and the Locker awaits!
Links to previous movies and blog posts can be found at the bottom of the page, as per usual!
In The Curse of the Black Pearl, we got to meet our unlikely trio of happy marauders, Jack Sparrow (Johnny Depp), Elizabeth Swann (Keira Knightley) and Will Turner (Orlando Bloom), and after a turn (or three) with zombies, Jack managed to abscond with the Pearl, away from the gallows, while Will and Elizabeth were engaged to be married.
Now at the start of Dead Man's Chest, Jack is ... well, he hitches a ride in a coffin to escape a REALLY creepy prison island, where he went to discover a piece of wet parchment ... bag ... thing, that holds the image of a key.
Not just any key, at that.
Because another introduction in this movie is given to the fact that a ship literally gets eaten in the middle of the high seas by we have no idea what. Something big under the water, that's what!
And as for Will and Elizabeth ... well, there's a new player in down.
His name's Lord Cutler Beckett, he's with the East India Trading Company, and like everyone else on the planet he's after Jack or, more specifically, Jack's compass. As Will and Elizabeth helped Jack escape, they're thrown into prison, but Will is released on condition that he retrieves the compass, and then he can go free.
So, off Will goes, and as is the nature of these things does, in fact, fall in with Jack once more. Jack, however, has by this time received a warning by none other than Boostrap Bill (remember him? Will's sorta-dead father?) that he's being hunted, and hunted for the fact that his time's up. Davy Jones is calling in his debt:
having raised the Pearl for Jack, it's now been thirteen years and Jack must repay him by serving on The Flying Dutchman, Jones' ship.
Jack, as expected, isn't all that keen on this, though he does have bigger issues by the time he and Will reunite: namely, he's been nominated as deity to a bunch of cannibals on an island no one goes to, so the crew and Will actually need to save HIM before they can try and figure out the rest.
Bone cage rolling and quick getaways where 'every many for himself' is made manifest later, Jack tricks Will into getting caught by Jones (which, by the way, the LOOK on the squid's face when he runs into him, like 'you're not dead and you're alive, EXCUSE ME SIR'), as sort-of start of repayment. 100 souls in exchange for his own life, to which Jack says SURE THING!
But there's more to it than this, because Will's on the Dutchman with a mission now: to discover the key. What he discovers instead is his own father, and what a meeting that is! Undead dead pirate father sees very much living pirate son, and Will swears to break Bill free of the Dutchman if it's the last thing he'll ever do.
Oh and, he does in fact figure out where the hell the key is. It's on Jones' person at all times, hidden among all his tentacle-y beard (revealed during a betting game of dice). So, naturally, Will steals it, and takes off into the night.
Meanwhile, to backtrack, Elizabeth's father tried to get Elizabeth to England, unsuccessfully, so she helped herself by putting a gun to Beckett's face and taking the papers that ensure freedom. Then she, too, hightails it after Jack, disguising herself as a young man and meeting with him at Tortuga, where the crew also takes on one former Commodore Norrington, because the man's just super down on his luck after trying to catch the Pearl ever since the end of movie one.
Jack convinces Elizabeth that what she wants most is actually a chest, not Will - and the reason why Jack's been having everyone else use his compass is because he's undecided and so the compass doesn't know where to point (and when it does, it points to Elizabeth, of all people).
So off they go to find the bloody chest, which, as explained by Tia Dalma earlier in the movie when the men go and visit her, is the chest belonging to Davy Jones himself, containing ... his heart. Jones cut out his heart after being betrayed by the woman he loved, and that turned him into the monster he is today, rather than an honourable captain serving a sacred duty.
Tia Dalma ALSO figures out Jack's being hunted by the monster all other monsters fear, and gives him a jar of dirt to keep with him at all times, because he's safe on land, not at sea.
This ... doesn't make much sense since Jones could probably carry a baggie of dirt with him then, but that aside, all paths now converge on the island where Jones initially buried the chest (by the way, yes: Jones is ALSO on the way to the chest, because he's got a sneaking suspicion that he's been three steps behind Jack, but he's starting to catch up).
What ensues is a world-famous three-way duel between Jack, Will and Norrington as they fight for the key that opens the chest; this includes but is not limited to running, rolling, and riding a wheel off the side of a broken-down mill.
Meanwhile, Elizabeth is the one actually left going after the chest when two of the Pearl's pirates steal it, and on top of that the three of them end up fighting off the pirates JONES sends ashore for the chest, so it's a regular to-do the like of which Isla Cruces hasn't seen in ... ever, really.
Just when you think things might go over well, Norrington pulls a fast one and sacrifices himself to let the others escape, after Jack put the heart into the jar of dirt given to him by Tia Dalma.
This, naturally, turns out empty just when he's trying to negotiate with Jones, because SURPRISE, Norrington took the heart AND the pardon papers when he took off! Man DID learn something from pirates, after all.
Our people valiantly try to defend the Pearl from the kraken - said monster that Jones keeps as pet - but it's literally no use, which Will also knows, having seen the way the creature hunts and never lets its pray loose. So in the end, Elizabeth uses what she's learned during the course of this latest adventure (which is, that Jack is at the very least physically attracted to her) and cuffs him to the ship to allow everyone else to escape in a rowboat to the nearest strip of land.
Jack is just a hint too slow to escape this time, and goes down fighting as the kraken takes him - and the Pearl - down to the Locker.
The rest of them gather for a wake at Tia Dalma's, mourning their fallen friend, until the swamp witch says: WHAT IF they could bring Jack back?
There's just a small chance for it, and they're going to need it, because Norrington brings the heart of Davy Jones to Beckett, basically giving Beckett command of the seas (Norrington will regret this later, don't worry), and they can only hope to have a fighting chance if they have Jack. And to get Jack, they need a captain who's sailed treacherous waters before.
Enter, Hector Barbossa!
And while you're at it, have a look at those cannibals making the dog with the jail key their new god now that Jack's gone.
FIN!
Dead Man's Chest had the ungrateful job of being the middle installment in the sprawling Pirates saga, but it did the task it was given rather well enough, all things considered.
It sets up a larger enemy, introduces a much more in-depth pirate lore, and it also reveals that every single person is capable of great betrayal and great loyalty all in the same breath, which isn't something you see often nowadays, if you think about it.
Jack, as always, remains a delight, and if you think Davy Jones is the one you'll hate the most, don't hold your breath, because Beckett takes that cake by a MILE.
I was never one of those who subscribed to the belief Elizabeth should have ended up with Jack, and rewatching this movie now as an adult reinforces that belief, because all there actually is to it here is a power-play and Elizabeth learning to use feminine tricks to get men to do her bidding, Jack included.
Overall, this one's funny, breathtaking, entertaining, and above all makes you want to watch the third without pause.
Because we need to know if they get Jack, damnit!
Also I freaking LOVE Jones and the Dutchman. Sue me.
xx
*images and video not mine
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