"Get me the HELL out of here!"
Hello everyone!
I need to figure out a better way to introduce these blogs, but that being said, however, the point is that this is where I chatter on and on about the movie I'm going to be writing about subsequently in the post.
Now as you know, my list to catch up is still pretty much a mile long, however, I'm finally starting to make some sort of a dent in it!
And still I manage to go back and rewatch the Hobbit franchise for some reason or other ...
Ahem.
I was on a Dwayne Johnson binge it looks like, and I'm continuing it with another one of his movies soon enough, but for the time being let's start talking about this hilarious flick.
Of course it's Jumanji: Welcome to the Jungle.
Let's get one thing clear: I never saw the original Jumanji. For some odd reason I keep thinking it's more of a terrifying movie than this one was slated as, which I know is super odd, and I just never got around to it. In any event, however, you don't HAVE to watch the original to watch this sequel, as everything is pretty much explained.
Now, onto the actual movie!
In 1996, a board game washes up on the beach and Alex Vreeke is totally unimpressed by it. That night, however, it changes into a video game and he wakes up to the sound of jungle drums, starts playing it ... and disappears.
The scene shifts to twenty years later when four high school students are sent to detention together for different reasons: Spencer, Fridge, Bethany and Martha. They need to clear out the basement and de-staple magazines so the paper can then be shredded or recycled or whatever, but while Spencer and Martha are digging into it, Fridge and Bethany are exploring.
This is how they find the Jumanji video game, and don't ask me how it even ended up in a high school basement; of course that's more tempting than working so the four decide to play ... and get sucked into the game itself.
They appear as the avatars they had chosen for themselves, which means Spencer is Dr. Smolder Bravestone (Johnson), Fridge is Dr. "Mouse" Finbar (Kevin Hart), Martha is a kick-ass commando Ruby Roundhouse (Karen Gillian) and Bethany is chubby Dr. Sheldon Oberon (Jack Black).
Yep, the high school cheerleader ends up being a chubby guy.
Awesome.
The four quickly realise they're going to have to play their way across the game, and that each of them has different skillsets which allows them to help the other players (yes, this is also a metaphor for them having to work together to get to the other side).
Oh, and, did I mention that each has three lives?
Yup, they can die two times and be returned to the game, but the third time death is it.
Game over.
They're told the purpose of this game by NPC Nigel: corrupt Russel Van Pelt, who once worked with Bravestone, stole the powerful (and magical) Jaguar diamond from its place, claiming it for himself, which in itself wouldn't be so bad if he didn't end up cursing Jumanji in the process. The team's mission: get the diamond back to where it belongs, and in the end scream JUMANJI!
Piece of cake, right?
Oh, don't give cake to Mouse. It makes him explode.
Managing to evade carnivorous hippos and getting to the bazaar where they almost get bitten by a black mamba, the team totally would have been dead meat since Van Pelt finds them if they weren't rescued by the FIFTH player in the game - Alex Vreeke (Nick Jonas)! Who, unfortunately, doesn't know he's been stuck in Jumanji for twenty years ...
They kind of have to break this to him as well as convince him to help them get through the next level, which is to steal a helicopter so they can fly out of there.
This is done by having Bethany teach Martha how to flirt, which is probably the funniest thing I've seen in a while, as Jack Black has to pretend he's a high school girl and an expert at flirting with boys. I'm sure they all got a kick out of THAT.
Of course then they realise that one of Ruby's strengths is dance fighting, and while Jack Black and Kevin Hart scream YOU GO GIRL! SLAY! YOU OUR QUEEN! Karen Gillian kicks some serious ass and saves the lot.
With the helicopter now in their possession, they fly off, only to learn Mouse dropped the jewel (oh yeah, did I mention? Nigel actually gave the lot of them the jewel at the start of the game before driving off) and now it's in the middle of a herd of white rhinos, which conveniently also eat humans in this game.
They manage to get the jewel and also end up saving Alex who almost dies after a mosquito bite (because some of these weaknesses are just plain weird), but Bethany aka Shelly transfers one of her lives to him.
At this point, when they start the final leg, which is to get the jewel up to the jaguar, everyone has only one life left so it's all or nothing when Van Pelt and his cronies come after them.
With a hell of a lot of team work (and Kevin Hart on the back of an elephant), they manage to defeat Van Pelt and save Jumanji, and after a very brief thought of staying (this by Spencer), they return to the real world.
Only, Alex isn't with them.
Hurrying over to the Vreeke house, which before was a dilapidated wreck with the family in shambles, the four find it completely restored and decorated for Christmas, and run into an adult and married Alex, who explains the game ejected him back in 1996 and he could live his life; he named his daughter Bethany after the girl who saved him, and also has a son, Andy.
After that, the four of them remain close, Spencer and Fridge reconciling from their earlier falling-out, Bethany now caring for people more than for clothes and wanting to backpack in the summer, and Martha and Spencer becoming a couple.
And just when you think all is well, all four of them hear the jungle drums again.
While I'm sitting there thinking, drats, did Van Pelt somehow survive? Fridge solves the dilemma for me by smashing Jumanji with a bowling ball behind the school, so that no one would get sucked into it ever again.
The end!
Okay, first off, Dwayne Johnson and Kevin Hart are pretty much a winning combination no matter where or when they pop up. So it was a given they'd make this whole thing beyond hilarious. Karen Gillian added some nice feminine touches, but the MVP has to be Jack Black who I swear gets funnier with time. I couldn't get enough of these four as they traipsed through Jumanji!
And with rumours flying that there's going to be a sequel, I honestly CAN'T WAIT.
If you haven't seen the movie yet - what're you waiting for?! It's got adventure, humour, and Dwayne Johnson's epic smolder.
That's a good way to start this summer if you ask me.
xx
*images and video not mine
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