"In a hole in the ground there lived a Hobbit ..."
Hello everyone!
Like I mentioned somewhere at some point, Tolkien has been my all-time favourite author for ... well, at this point it's been decades I would think, and that's kind of a little scary, but also kind of not at the same time.
Recently, I've also been able to look back on the movies they released during epic fantasy heyday, and of course all my memories were roused, as well.
These movies defined my life in such a strong way that it'd be impossible for me to define exactly how much, so instead I'm going to let the blogs do my talking for me.
This means it's time to pack up our handkerchiefs and get our walking sticks out, because The Hobbit launches with An Unexpected Journey, right now!
An Unexpected Journey begins exactly as you might expect - with a Hobbit, who happens to be living in a hole in the ground. Bilbo Baggins narrates the story to his cousin Frodo as he writes it down into the Red Book, and during the prologue we learn that sixty years ago he was a different person altogether.
And also, that there was a kingdom in the Lonely Mountain, that the Dwarves found this brilliant stone called the Arkenstone, and because they were so fabulously wealthy a dragon came down from the north wastes to take up residence, exiling the Dwarves into the wilderness.
This is where Bilbo comes in.
See, sixty years ago Gandalf happens to stop by the Shire, decides Bilbo's gotten way too comfortable and too set in his ways, and invites thirteen Dwarves to an impromptu dinner party over at his place (that Bilbo has no idea he's throwing).
After they eat him out of his pantries and Thorin Oakenshiled (played by the incomparable Richard Armitage) arrives, it's pretty clear the Hobbit wants basically nothing to do with them, and initially doesn't agree to go.
Next morning, however, he changes his mind, signs the contract they'd prepared for him, and rushes after them, just in time to catch up with the group before they cross the borders of the Shire and into the wilderness beyond.
Their first check comes during a pitstop they make to sleep the night away, when Fili and Kili, Thorin's nephews, are charged with looking after the ponies ... and discover there's not enough of them, all of a sudden.
Trolls happen to love a nice, juicy pony, when they can find one, and while Bilbo's all for alerting Thorin, the two young Dwarves are like, nah, you're a burglar, you can go get them and nobody'll be the wiser!
This, of course, ends badly, because not only do the trolls figure out Bilbo's there, but they use him to their advantage when the Dwarves come charging to the rescue (I'm pretty sure Thorin's nephews figured out that their so-called burglar is pretty ... useless LOL), forcing them to lay down their weapons, after which they end up hog-tied and in preparation for a BBQ.
Bilbo, spotting a shadow flitting nearby, decides it's all or nothing, and plays the trolls for all he's worth, including but not limited to trying to convince them of the best way to eat said Dwarves, to the fact that they're infected with some sort of parasite.
The Dwarves do NOT like that one, lemme tell you, but Bilbo's face is a picture and Thorin finally clocks into what he's doing, silently convincing the others to play along, just in time for Gandalf to reveal himself, help a little sunlight to enter the glade, and thus allow for the trolls to turn into stone when the sun hits them.
Now, since this (mis)adventure comes right on the heels of Balin telling the story of how the Dwarves tried to reclaim Moria, much to their bad luck as Azog the Defiler kills King Thror and then heads straight for the Heirs of Durin, after which Thorin uses the oaken branch as a shield and rises as newly-minted king, you'll see that following the Orcs as they hunt down our heroes is vital for this part of the movie.
See, Thorin maintains Azog died of wounds sustained during that battle, but neither Gandalf nor Balin are quite so certain - and as viewers, we KNOW that's not the case when we witness a gathering at Weathertop, and Azog promising a huge reward for whoever brings him Thorin's head.
It's during their uneasiness that Radagast the Brown finds them, after dealing with sickness that's spreading over Mirkwood, starting right out of Dol Guldur, the old fortress. The hippy-wizard's brave enough to go to said fortress, and he brings Gandalf proof that something's rotten in the castle, as the Morgul blade was only ever wielded by one person alone.
Using his rabbit-drawn sleigh (listen, I'm not making this up) he then proceeds to draw the Orc pursuers away from their quarry, while Gandalf finds the secret entrance to the valley of Imladris, which Thorin had been hell-bent on avoiding. With nothing for it now but to seek shelter there, he's also persuaded to show Elrond (fan-favourite Hugo Weaving returns for his role of the Elven-lord) the map of the Lonely Mountain, which they can't figure out.
They happen have a key to a hidden door, but no clue where said hidden door is. Elrond, being smart, reads hidden letters on the map that explain exactly where the door is, and what the circumstances have to be for it to be opened.
He also drags Gandalf in front of his cast of celebrity judges, aka the White Council, which currently includes Galadriel and Saruman, both of whom have differing opinions as to whether or not Thorin's quest is wise. Saruman drones on and on how he can't condone it, not that the Dwarves would have listened as, even as the old Morgul blade is revealed and everyone's shocked into silence, Elrond's steward comes running in to say his guests have ... left.
Yup, Gandalf and Thorin hatched a plan, only Thorin plays it loose and pushes their group forward into the mountains, directly into the battle of stone giants, from which they eventually find refuge in a cave.
Bilbo attempts to sneak back to Imladris, and he might have even succeeded, because he makes even (and especially) Thorin feel bad about how he's been treated, when the sword he got out of the troll-hoard glows blue, indicating Orcs are close-by.
A hidden hatch opens, dropping them all deeper into the mountain, and right into the lap of the Goblin-king, a hideous, malformed creature, who tells Thorin Azog wants his head, then proceeds to try and have them killed when Thorin's weapon is revealed - also coming from the troll-hoard, also glowing blue, but famed for the ancient Goblin wars it participated in, and called Orcrist.
It's during this time that Gandalf rejoins the party and we play Lemmings through the mountain to escape, but the important bit doesn't happen with the Dwarves: rather, it's with Bilbo, who isn't captured, but falls deeper into the darkness, puts his hand on a round object, and places it in his pocket.
He then evades being eaten by something called Gollum, and learns that the ring he picked up will make him invisible - and a host of other things, but the important thing is he escapes, WITH the ring, thus starting an even bigger journey without realizing it.
Rejoining the company, they all hide out in the trees when Azog pops up to hunt them down again, and things would have gone VERY badly there if not for the timely intervention of a moth who Gandalf sends for aid, and this brings down the wrath of the eagles to help them.
Just in the nick of time, too, as Azog's preparing to finish Thorin off, and with him Bilbo, because our darling, silly Hobbit decided to go protect the king, but luckily the eagles get them all to safety, Thorin finally fully accepts Bilbo as a companion, and a thrush passes by them flying in the direction of the Lonely Mountain, fully visible to our crew now.
It then proceeds to knock a snail against a stone loud enough to wake this sleeping dragon under a shower of gold, so while Bilbo seems to think the worst is behind them, the worst is still ahead, and they have no clue.
But we'll be taking a look at THAT next week, in The Desolation of Smaug!
The first in (originally) a planned duology which was then expanded into a trilogy, An Unexpected Journey is the most faithful to the original book and follows it almost page-to-page, serving as introduction to our protagonists, the home-missing Bilbo who becomes such a big part in the shaping of Middle-Earth as we know it, and the Dwarves who're attempting beyond hope to reclaim a homeland some have never even seen.
It also brings back cast members like Ian McKellen and Cate Blanchett, along with Elijah Wood, who reprise their roles from the original trilogy with gusto, serving as a bridge between the two.
Funny, charming, and with an entertaining cast of characters, An Unexpected Journey serves just the right amount of cosy and dangerous to draw you into this magical world that most who enter fall in love with, so be sure to tune in as we check back with them to see just how, exactly, they'll be dealing with the dragon asleep in their basement.
See you next week!
xx
*images and video not mine
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