Hello everyone!
Then again, I kind of wanted to read it before going into the television show, so I'd know some of what to expect!
And I have to tell you, it's good.
It's nothing complicated, it's nothing dramatic, and a lot of people might not find it interesting because it doesn't cover any massive, bombastic situations, but mostly Selena's normal, day-to-day life, specifically later after her marriage to her husband and how they went about their days.
I, personally, loved it.
And it's a different kind of pain to read about the husband's feelings after his wife is murdered. I think I bawled my eyes out over that chapter.
Anyway, this book needs no more introduction, so let's check out To Selena, With love, by her widower, Chris Perez.
For any of you who don't know yet: Selena Quintanilla was a Tejano music star and arguably its reigning Queen for a few short years from the end of the eighties to the beginning of the nineties, right before she was shot and killed. At the time of her death, she was on the cusp of releasing an English album on the international market, the Tejano scene was her playground, she had won a Grammy and her star had never shone brighter.
She was only 23 years old.
She was only 23 years old.
It wasn't until 2012 that her widower actually wrote and published his memoir though, so that took some time, but understandably so if he's a private person and prefers to stay out of the limelight, not to mention given what you read in the book, it's fairly obvious the two loved each other very much.
The grieving process is different for everyone, but I'm very glad we get to read his side of the story. Because, if you pay attention to the Netflix show, that one's a bit more family-oriented in the sense that the Quintanillas drove the emphasis points.
So in this, you get Chris' view.
You get to see how he joined the band when AB, Selena's older brother, scouted him out to play guitar, how he added his own unique flavour to the music they were playing, and how he did in fact have a life before stepping onto the Quintanilla family map.
He was playing for a different Tejano band, he had a girlfriend, life was sort of good.
Then he and Selena fell in love.
It started happening during a trip to Acapulco but the more time they then spent together, the more Chris was convinced that this was more than just a passing infatuation. He allowed himself to be open to all possibilities, but even when they finally kissed for the first time (on the bus - all their important firsts would be on the tour bus, mind) it was mostly Selena who pressed forward, and also ... well.
They had to keep it a secret. Something the author explains didn't sit well with him.
See, Chris respected Abraham Quintanilla as a hard-working, family man, and he didn't feel right lying to him. Especially as he was (and probably remains) the type of person to come clean about the stuff that did happen in his life, like the time right after Selena's star started rising when he landed at the police station after an altercation, or when he and two other roadies trashed a hotel room, drunk.
For some reason, Abraham had no problem forgiving Chris for these indiscretions, though it has to be said that after the hotel room incident, Selena almost dumped his ass - which the author does agree would have been a perfectly logical move for her to do.
Nevertheless, the two persisted in a relationship, and according to the book it was actually Suzette, Selena's sister, who ratted them out to Abraham, though the man didn't initially kick Chris out of the band. He did, however, forbid anything to happen, not realizing how long the pair had been together and how strong their bond was already. Soon after though, Abraham did kick Chris to the curb, so Chris went back home where people who surrounded him supported and loved him, and didn't judge his choices (it's nasty to me to read just how much the band apparently turned their backs on Chris during this time, it's frankly appalling).
Selena and Chris continued seeing each other whenever they could, and eventually it was Selena who puled the plug on their dream of maybe letting Abraham come to terms with this - so they eloped and got married in secret.
This then allowed Chris to return to the band and Abraham apologized for pushing them into a corner, but all the same it does still feel, through the book at least, that the man continued to try and have his own way even when technically Selena wasn't his to command around anymore.
Then again, you can clearly see from the writing that the reason Abraham and Selena clashed so much was because she had his exact personality - it was her way or the highway, and there are a couple of occasions in the book where you can clearly see this, and I as reader am a bit miffed, but then again we all have out quirks and downsides that we aren't proud of, I suppose.
From here, the book goes on to describe their married life together, moving into the house next door from the Quintanillas, getting their pack of dogs and even a snake (the scene in which the snake escapes and manages to frighten Selena half to death is HILARIOUS), and the continued rise to fame, because at this time, Selena's biggest hits were coming out, the tour schedules were impossible for any normal human being, and Selena finally, FINALLY opened up her own boutiques, too.
Which is where Yolanda Saldivar helped out a lot, and not just with the fan club anymore. And where the trouble started.
Chris explains that with how busy they were, they trusted Yolanda to keep that part of the business going, but things started falling apart and not adding up, and Abraham was the first to tell Yolanda to hit the road, though of course we all know that's not what happened. And for some reason that will never be explained, Selena insisted on getting the documents from Yolanda herself instead of getting lawyers to handle it all, which might have saved her life.
Either way, regardless of how high Selena's star had risen, that she and Chris had just bought a property on which to build their own house and start a family after the international tour, to slow down, her life was snuffed out in the altercation with Yolanda, who shot her in the back.
And has since claimed all sorts of things, that it was an accident, that Selena attacked her, that Yolanda's prints weren't even on the gun to begin with so she was wrongfully accused ... the list goes on if you snoop around on the internet. She's eligible for parole in 2025, but hopefully someone in the US figures out this mentally unstable woman shouldn't be allowed to walk freely among the people anymore so she doesn't fixate on someone else, get obsessed, and end up repeating herself again. We'll see.
The chapter detailing Chris' life after Selena's death is the darkest of the book because he does speak of the funeral and how he went downhill for a while, and it's difficult enough to read, trust me. I can't even imagine living it. Especially as you get a sense of how loving and giving Selena was throughout the book, surprising Chris with buying him a truck he'd wanted but was thinking about before getting, little notes and dinners, and all the other small things, like how she loved walking barefoot on warm concrete, how she could relax with Chris' family and not need to be on edge, and it's obvious how much she loved her husband.
There are many rumours swirling around, most notably that Selena had an affair with her plastic surgeon (!), one Ricardo Martinez, and that she was pregnant with his child. As you may or may not know, the autopsy definitely put to rest any pregnancy claims, not to mention, at 23, it is HIGHLY suspect she'd need a plastic surgeon to begin with. The claims she was going to run away to Mexico with him, apparently proven by a packed suitcase and a work permit for Mexico, seem to forget Selena was on the verge of opening a boutique in Mexico at the time.
Also, this doctor had his 'tell all' interview in August 2012 - interestingly, Chris' book was published in March that same year. It's easy to fabricate a story if you have actual details behind it, which Chris puts in his book.
Plus, WHEN would Selena find time for an affair in her grueling schedule? Is the better question.
ANYWAY, I invite you to read the book yourselves and judge. No one can make up your mind for you, but I think it's highly disgusting how people still want to ride on her coattails when she's been dead for over 25 years.
The book is WELL worth your time, I promise.
xx
*image not mine
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